"Well you know, the Yankees really needed a laid-back, easy-going, ex-Athletic, aging, neaderthal-looking simpleton, who throws lefty and is a fielding liability. You know I didn't think I would enjoy the move from center to a corner outfield position, but..." he paused to high-five Melky and start an elaborate ethnic hug with Robinson Cano. "I'm having so much fun I was thinking about starting my own WBC team..."
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